the Loo

I was in Malaysia for 3 weeks. I was hoping to get a driving license, but 3 weeks was just too short. im not worried. i could ride a fukin bike, how’s that?
o well having a driving license is overrated . Everybody knows the goverment will forbid vehicles and enforce everyone to ride a bike anyways. Enough small talk.

I took MAS to KLIA. This one Pramugara went all friendly and suddenly started to pinch me on the nipple. Since when do you pinch someone on the nipple? Is that some kind of a new thing in Malaysia? Beats me.

So i was trying to get some cheap t-shirts, sweatshirts etc back in Malaysia. The prices just make me want to shoot kittens. I dont keep tabs on how much these clothes usually cost. At prices ranging from RM70 to RM90, its just enough to get me jizz in my pants. Seriously though.

My mom’s friend from work came home for a visit With her daughter who studies in Egypt, apparently her uni is on break. But still. Its just awkward. We never knew each other that well and to come over out of the blue with an excuse “i want to know your place”, with her anak dara. its gold.
i mean if i were an anak dara and that my mom asked me to go to her friend’s house to know thier place and possibly her friend’s son, you think i’d tag along?

Everyone wears masks down there in Kuala Terengganu. Im such a paranoid and refused to leave home. I was coughing, sneezing, snorting for weeks even though i kept minimal time outside to such extent. I scared shitless to the fact that if i somehow caught the flu and that the germans would quarantine me,keep me in a small room and forbid me to go home for a week. That would suck hard.
Would suck hard.

Unfortunately we did not have the original footage, so i had to reenact the scene.

Enjoy.

Guess what just came in.
Super jizz in my super pants.

Yeah a brand spanking new iPod Touch.
3.5-inch widescreen Multi-Touch display and 480-by-320-pixel resolution at 163 pixels per inch.

.. yeah i wish XD

LOL just messing with you.
I got the package this morning from Woncheon-dong Korea. It took them a month to ship this little fucker.

Yep it was an iPod Nano Silver 8G.

2-inch lcd screen with 320 x 240-pixel resolution. It costs next to nothing. Literally.

Im not a fan of small gadgets but ive to say im quite impressed. This thing is actually pretty decent. Clear-crystal image, high resolution videos, i wouldn’t ask for any better. Well its my first mp3 player afterall lol.

Ok now ive to get a Korean dictionary to figure out how to switch this thing on.

Woohoo

Who gets a €150 worth of good for free for playing some stupid online game? I know i do XD
Yeah you heard me fukin iPod Nano 8G for free. Jealous much n4ps?

Lets just hope it gets here. And by gets here, i mean not stolen and shit.

My stupid half-assed reply to the event question.

And my super handsome 1337 char =D

And if you were wondering why the gay username, it was a random pick.

ok you fucktards lets me say this once and for all so you stop getting clueless. Initially its entertaining to listen to your hateful comments but after some time the excitement wavers and it stops getting funny a while ago.

YOU DONT TELL ME HOW DO I EAT MY FOOD.

Who are you? my mother?
“They dont eat it like this. They dont eat that this way”
If I wanted to eat rice with fucking pig HELL I WOULD. And youre gonna stop me?

“They dont eat cottage cheese with strawberries”
What made you think you know better than i do? I suggest you just stop speculating on things you don’t know. I do my research, Mr.Smart Ass.

“Im not used to eat this kind of thing*roll eyes*”
GAH
It’s not about how youre not use to eat this kind of thing, its about eating healhty and im not getting fat. Please look into the mirror sometimes and see for yourself why im not convinced to your notion. Look who’s talking.

“4 Eggs a day? Even x doesnt eat that much”
Excuse me, do i buy eggs with your money? Why are you so troubled about my eating my food? Seriously. I haven’t got the foggiest idea why you people are so intrigued.

I dont want to know, and if you really want to tell me how i should eat my food, you better put forth strong arguments backed by facts. Else, i tell you what; why don’t you harp your sermon to those guys who share your fancy. It’ll make a good sport.

I received my order (a pair of pants) yesterday. And here what comes along with the pants; a piece of note and a Happy Cola.

It says:
Hallo Herr Shabri,
Sollte die Hose gefällt und paßt, würde mich in jedem Fall über eine Bewertung freuen, denn nur so kann ich wissen, ob alles ok ist, oder nicht.
viele grüße
Should the pants please and fit you, i would be very glad to receive a Feedback so that i’ll know if everything’s fine or not.

Up to this point, i thought that was pretty cute, with the handwriting, yellow notes and everything, until he toss in a Happy Cola. Some jelly candy.

HARAM. Never mind the ingredients alone, the bribery itself is wrongful.
what a cheap way to bribe me into giving nice feedbacks and comments.
But it was a job well done. I fell for it.

a while back i stumbled upon an article in a local malay newspaper which drew my attention greatly and wished i had something that i could write about it earlier. I had put a lot of thinking, time and effort i could feasibly muster on this one because i really want to do this without sounding like an idiot since this post takes me up a  few notches into the world of profesional writing that is highly intellectual. Sorry i just exegerrated that.

So the article was about Malay language. How intriguing can it get? But yes, The writer, who apparently claimed to be one badass malay grammar police,expressed his worry to the malay-speaking community, and put a huge blame on them especially the young generations for a large misusage of the language.

I can’t really tell which newspaper was it in, but what i can tell is that there are at least that many people who loves to talk bullshit and start to lay and spread their mental groundwork to justify the world with their own terms. And sadly, they are no other than one of those self-indugent ass who clearly wasn’t given much attention by their peers.

Im quoting some of his statements; (literally translated)
The language is largely built on a such strong influence of the English language. I am deeply saddened by the fact that people are more tend to choosing loanwords (kata pungut) over malay’s.
Why kreatif instead of daya cipta? And realiti instead of kenyataan?
This worship of the english language has to stop.

First off, language evolves with time. Language is believed to first appear between 30,000-100,000 years ago. Those who’re all for Darwins, you may say language evolves at the same time as the human evolves. But the other see it as an adaptation and a non-adaptive element arising as a byproduct of other processes. That’s why you don’t see someone talks symbols nowadays.

You don’t see people talk sanskrit. And you expect people to use Melayu-tulen in this age? Not going to happen. The only Malay words that is genuinely originated from the Malay roots are nasi(rice), rumput(grass), batu(rock), and babi(boar). [credits to kimi] These mere 4 words. Try to translate everything to those four words.

Old Malay(Melayu kuno) is heavily influenced by Sanskrit. Some Malay words used today represents a small part aftermath of the evolution of language from the earlier ancient Malay times.

Sanskrit(Old Malay) Malay
marvuat berbuat
nimakan dimakan
mamava membawa
sukhacitta sukacita

As such, in the course of adaptation, which conveys the very process of evolution, consequential inluence of other languages is inevitable. If it’s the worship that worries him, which is not the crux of the issue, then his ignorance is blinding.

(Arabic) isnin selasa rabu, sahabat khianat ikhlas,
(Portugese) almari, garfu, gereja, tuala, limau,
(Persian) anggur, askar, bandar, dewan
(Tamil & Hindustani)  kakak, kapal, misai, unta
(Spanish) Wanita
(Dutch) buku, aksi
(English) komputer telefon biskut, januari februari mac, bas van motosikal,

Tell me how he overlooked this. Well Im not surprised.
There are a lot of great deal to examine and introspect every details, pros and cons on this matter, but what whet my appetite is the diversity. That’s is what so beautiful about language. How it changes and advance through the ladder of time. It’s giving such a capacious opportunity thus bring it to a whole new dimension of space for development.
Or you wish to stick with “itĕk chedera telah semboh”, “perabut yang chantĕk“. It’s clearly your choice.

Although i find his statement rather disconcerted and incoherent, there are times when we are in the same wavelength on one particular matter. Im quoting his other statement to back this up;
I find the hugest abuse of Malay language is from the media sector. One of our local National broadcasting station introduced their new catchphrase: “infotainmen” for their malay-based channel lately. It’s just two english words that were mashed together and carries no meaning nonetheless. This upsets me.

Ditto! Those from the media are brainless anyway. Everything is viewed from their closeted point of view and it’s very much justifyable solely based on thier own perspective and logic. They ditch  truth, facts, and basis. And the most gullible of all would surely fall for it.
I watched this one documentary show about misuse of malay language in the market. How the signboards and the labels have wrong spellings on them. Then there is one part when they show a signboard “rumah istirahat” denoting that it’s wrongly spelled. They might get the idea of “istirehat” was the right word. Istirahat is the right word for it and they can at least do some research and get their facts right.

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p/s: 50th post! Thank you friendster! I’ve been writing for three years plus now and still counting. My writing is provocative, offensive and ridiculous as always, but they were all for the sake of sheer entertainment. I always remind people to not take it too seriously. There are a lot of typos and grammatical errors in my writing, but I
hardly ever re-read my posts to correct them so I tend to leave it as
that. I enjoy writing alot, and i did it initially for personal purposes. I wanted to read what i’ve written in my earlier days when i got old, just to be reminded of what state of mind was I in. But i’ve been getting quite positive feedback from my friends and it’s very interesting to know that some people really enjoy reading them. So im going to continue writing and thank you for all the suports!

i decided to share with everyone of how funny my friend is, despite the fact that she showed such dark personality, demonic radiance, and tense character within her circle. I did not just say that. It’s nothing personal, really, but i think it would be a very fun read. Well at least fun enough to get me off my chair laughing my heart out. That girl cracks me up every single time.

So i was chatting with my friend, out of boredom. We talked about anything that revolves around each other’s world, work,study, pretty much crappy stuff. I usually thrashtalked about people because i happen to be very good at judging people and have a very developed sense of paranoidal logic.

One night I was talking about an old friend of mine. very messed-up. So I asked her if she had any idea of how to settle things with him, in very nice friendly way. I didn’t expect her to blurt out flat-out ludicrous statements, considering that i spelled things out in a very earnest manner. I didnt even see that coming! I laughed so hard that my throat hurts. Here are the conversation i had saved in my log.

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Her: camni
Her: ko ajak der minum air milo panas
Her: tapi ber ko bg air milo sejuk la
Her: pastu ko ajak la der, jom main baling2air nak?
fathi: hahha ko ni
Her: ko jirus la air panas kat der

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On Another case, she expressed her concern of how she could not imagine herself waking up very early in the morning to perform solat Subuh (3a.m) here in Spring-Summer. So i told her;

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Her: aku tak dpt byngkan aku kene bgn tgh malam untuk solat subuh?"
fathi: haha tu mesti la
fathi: tapi kalo ko org yg aktif malam takpe
fathi: macam ako
Her: hm..
Her: lipas kat rumah aku aktif gile waktu malam
fathi: …

Everybody has been making such a big fuss about the spring. Something hardly likely for me to comprehend. What’s so good about the spring? Sunny weather, flowers, rainbows, spring rabbits and of all those shitty iconic brainwashing propaganda. Load of bollocks.

What people has been advocating is blatant capitulation that is inherently incompatible with my brand of logic.
I tell you why.

Pollen,kids,bugs. Those little fucknaughts.

Pollen(debunga) are the most annoying thing since my saggy-ass blabbermouth neighbours. *I’ll get into that in later on.
Most flowering plants bloom this time of year. In the process, they spread spores and pollen. Now What is retard about that part, was that they pollute. They pollute the air, the streets.They stick to your laundries and your clothes and snuck into your nostrils down to your lungs, and before you even know it, you get sick. Pollen- Pollution, pollute. Irony.

Kids.In my previous posts i’ve been telling people of how much i hate kids and how they annoy me out of my skull. Whenever the weather’s nice, the kids will come out and play in the area around my house, making noises and shit. Dope heads. Aren’t they the loudest creature god ever made.

Flies. Word has it that the fly larvae undergo their metamorphosis to become adult flies as short as 1 day, and i heard they can live up to 28 days. Well not in my case. It depends on of how good I am with the swatter. There was once when i tried to suck them dead using a vaccum cleaner. No chance. Those slick little bastards are faster than what i’ve expected. But I prefer hitting them with thick zines or anything that you can roll and make a thick bat-like club out of it. Wham! Wham! I enjoy every second of their white shit squirting out from their fat flesh. What a feeling.

Moth. One night when i was about to go to sleep, i heard this buzzing sound. And It kept on hitting the windows and the walls. Buzz.Thump.Buzz.Thump. It’s like an endless resounding suck ass serenade that kept resonating with vibration of the sorrounding air. God, It’s sucking my will to live!! So I turn the light back on, locate those little fuckers and smack them with a roll of Ø1.5in wrapping papper, leaving them slightly unconscious and then put them in an envelope. What resulted after that, is something i rather not say. Very disturbing shit.

I get people asking me all the time, how is it like living abroad, in germany to be on the money. Please, spare me. And one that hit me clueless is- how’s germany different from Malaysia? I’d say pretty much everything. Unless you would narrow down your interrogative proposal, the best answer i could come up with is [the weather].

For the first few months it almost felt awkward, very awkward at that. At this point of time, you started to overthinking things as your paranoia surfaces right up from your feeble mind and fragile flesh. It’s pretty tense. Took me some time to loosen up.

You might want to hone your german language skills before ever coming here. The first thing we acknowledged was that the Germans are very proud of their language. You dont want to ask them directions in English as they might ignore you. But they can be surprisingly friendly if you throw some german into your sentence even if you read it wrong, or even attempt to. -Or so we were informed. (Most of them don’t really speak English) Anyways there are relatively larger english-spoken german community in some places densed with tourist and foreigners like Berlin for instance. So rest assured.

The transportation here is really convinient and reliable. The system is much to my surprise, undeniably superior. They have an exact schedule of estimated time of departure and arrival, undoubtly precise on every minute. If you would want to have a long trip, please make sure to make it in time and stick to the time plan. They will leave sharp on the dot. The time plans are accesible from the net, ticket booths and the Reisezentrum on every station. Wouldn’t cost a dime.

Shopping has never been easier. I like the fact that i can use my bank card as a debit card, which I can use it in any grocery store. That is why i scarcely ever had cash with me. Saves me the trouble.

Online shopping is swift, safe and smooth. Im such a bum, and i don’t go out to stores quite often to get stuffs. And stuff like vacuum cleaner, microwave and all those big ass electric appliances are such a pain, and i can’t imagine to be moving around with those in a train or a bus. You can have your wares delivered within 3 to 7 days, and they’ll send it right to your doorstep. Everything from customer service, money-back guarantee, package retour etc. are first-rate. Just make sure not to spend your money too much. Remember, less is much, and much is really too much.

OK, since i’ve been writing quite a lot, and nobody would ever want to read anymore if I keep on dragging this too long, so i guess i’ll make a lists about random stuffs which you may find it interesting to know.

• seemingly women smoke more than men. Don’t be surprised if you run into a woman in veil carrying her baby,smoking. Boy am i surprised.
• motorbikes are rarely seen on the streets. While bicycles are common stuff. It’s a must-have.
• No.1 is written like no.7, no.4 is like no.9, and no.9 is like the letter g.
• In numbering system, comma"," replaces dot"." and vice versa. 5 euros 20 cents and 5000 euros are written €5,20 and €5.000 respectively. Dont get it mixed up or prepare to mourn over your gravely mistake!
• Every noun is written with cappital Letter.
• There are words with fricken 3 asses! i mean "s"es. Well tell me how you read that. hisss
• I just discovered a word with 3 f’s. Shifffahrt.(boat ride)
• For some reason, they have same identical handwriting and that is so weird it pisses me off.
• Any unwanted furnites are to be left outside. The mobs will clean it up in seconds. So don’t leave your things outside unattended or it will be mistaken as a give-away.
• Everything is german-dubbed in the televesion. Movies, TV shows, cartoons, interviews to name a few. The only english-based entertainment available is MTV channel (with german subtitles).
• All new-release movies showing in the cinema are german-dubbed.
• You know that chequered exercise books we used for mathematics in standard 3/4? They fricken use that in college!! And what’s retard about that, i got looks for using blank A4 paper or that lined ones. God and I think they’re the freak.

Theres more to it, and im pretty much tired and it’s 4a.m. i’ll update the lists as soon as it hit me.